Self-Rejection Test (part 2)

Written by: Bill Gothard

As we grow up, most of us have physical, mental or parental characteristics which are different from those around us. Very often during early school years, classmates point out these differences in jest. The resulting concerns on outward appearance may cause varying degrees of self-rejection. Grab a sheet of paper and answer the following questions with a “yes” or “no” answer to see if you are suffering from self-rejection:

A. You put over-attention on clothes

Undue concern for clothes may be an attempt to cover up or compensate for unchangeable physical features which are rejected. Jesus linked these two thoughts in Mathew 6:27, 28 “Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? And why take ye thought for clothing?”

B. You have an inability to fully trust God

If we reject God’s basic design in making us, it may then also be difficult to put confidence in the Designer for other areas of our life. “For we are His workmanship…” Ephesians 2:10 “I will praise thee for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.” Psalm 139:14

C. You have excessive shyness

Fear of what others will think of us may then cause others to reflect our attitudes of fear back to us. This is illustrated in the life of King Saul. See 1 Samuel 9 and 10.

D. You have difficulty loving others

We are to love our neighbor as we do ourselves. Thus, if we cannot “love ourselves” in the right way, we will also find it difficult to love others in the right way. “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself” Matthew 19:19.

E. You frequently criticize yourself

Complaints about unchangeable physical features, abilities, parentage and social heritage are significant indications of self-rejection. “Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker! Let the potsherd (broken pottery) strive with the potsherds of the earth. Shall the clay say to him that fashioned it, What makest thou? Or thy word, He hath no hands?” Isaiah 45:9

F. You wishfully compare yourself with others

Desiring to be different in areas that cannot be changed is a clear evidence of self-rejection. On the other hand, we should desire to be different in attitudes and character which do not conform to the image of Jesus Christ. “…Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus?” Romans 9:20

G. You have a floating bitterness

Many have said, “I hate myself.” They may be referring to things which they have said or done, or they may be referring to their whole being. In the latter case, their final hatred will be directed toward the one who made them. “For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord the church:” Ephesians 5:29

H. You try to look too perfect

It is healthy to a certain degree to keep improving on what we have done. But when the time expended outweighs the value of the accomplishment, then it is an unhealthy evidence of self-rejection.

I. You have attitudes of superiority

If we would boast of our achievements or use words outside our vocabulary, or if we would refuse to associate with certain classes or people, we would be exhibiting outward indications of both pride and inferiority. Whatever we have is from God. Therefore, “…why do you glory, as if you have not received it?” 1 Corinthians 4:6,7

A person who appears superior is actually a person who inwardly feels inferior but is trying to narrow his field of comparison.

J. You awkwardly attempt to hide unchangeable defects

Self-conspicuous actions or statements to cover up unchangeable “defects” may indicate self-rejection. If we have a “defect” which we cannot change and which God through prayer has not changed, then we are able to claim 2 Corinthians 12:9 “…My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

K. You are extravagant

An evidence of self-rejection may be in the form of lavish spending on expensive items in the hopes that they will bring new admiration and acceptance to the owner. But “a man’s life consists not in the abundance of the things which he possesses” Luke 12:15.

L. You have the wrong priorities

When we neglect God-given responsibilities in order to spend great amounts of time in pursuits which will bring acclaim from others, we may be revealing evidences of self-rejection. Rather, “let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another” Galatians 6:4.

HOW DID YOU DO?

* if 3 or less are “yes” then you have a minor self-rejection problem and you should keep reading…

* if 4 to 6 are “yes” than you have a moderate self-rejection problem and it is important that you continue reading…

* if 7 to all 12 were a “yes” then you have a severe self-rejection problem and it is imperative that you continue reading…

We’ll continue in my next blog…